free-geek

because cool kids are boring

Being young

without comments

I recall reading something someone had written several years ago about why there seemed to be no adults who listened to emo. This individual’s theory was that once you hit your mid to late 20’s, you were incapable of understanding emo. That this was a scene for the young. One that could never be understood by the old.

I’m finding myself thinking about this idea tonight. Specifically in light of my attempt to reengage with my emotions and to put my heart back on my sleeve. I have no idea what I’m doing here, which means there are no safety precautions in place. If I don’t end up irreversibly emotionally scared by this, I’m going to be shocked.

And so I’m sitting here tonight, suddenly aware that sullen and depressed 17 year old me has set up shop in my heart and feeling somewhat despondent about the state of my life and where I go from here, and I’m wondering if being an adult requires one to take their heart off their sleeve. If it means locking our heart away and shutting ourselves off to certain things until it all boils over and we have no choice but to deal with it, at least until we can get things back under control. If, in our society, emotions are only for the young and reckless.

It makes a certain type of sense, if you look at it right. Emotions are the arch-nemesis of rationalism. Rationalism is order. Emotions are chaos. An industrial society thrives on order and marginalizes chaos.

I’m so fucked.

Hail Eris!

Written by Matt

February 12th, 2013 at 8:57 pm

Posted in Uncategorized